I can't recommend this video by Eckhart Tolle enough. For me, it's been a game-changer. Mr. Tolle describes the most effective approach to experiencing presence I have ever heard, and he does so with clarity and humor. If you don't have time right now to listen to it, click on the link and bookmark it. Then, make an appointment with yourself to give it a listen. You'll be glad you did.
If you think the games you have going are what lead to what it is you're seeking in life, forget it. What is required to go on this trip...you have to have experienced despair.